GLUE GUNS.

You know that saying, that for every girl with a broken heart is a boy with a glue gun? Apparently the boys at Wayzata need to make a little trip to Michael's because there has definitely not been some heroic, romantic boy to make me feel better after everything that has happened with... HIM. (I don't like to gossip about people, especially over the internet, but blogging is like therapy and I need to talk about what happened to make this post relavent.)

Long story short: He and I "dated" for like 2 weeks, we went on 1 "date" and hung out 1 other time. At the same him, my friend (let's call her Loretta) was dating my other friend (maybe...Reginald?) but after a while she decided she didn't like him as much as she thought and was planning on breaking up with him. Anyway, He and I broke up on Tuesday. Loretta didn't dump Reginald until Thursday. He and Loretta went on a date that Friday night. SWEEEET.

I realize it seems like I talk about Him a lot. And maybe you're thinking, "this chick still likes Him!" I assure you, I don't. That is NOT the issue. I mean, when He and I broke up, my immediate reaction was relief! He just added more stress to my life and I wasn't entirely sure how I felt about him anyway. Plus, He treated me really terribly. I never really felt like I was special, or like he was excited to see me. But after I found out about the date, I realized how He obviously didn't care about me at all. I gotta admit, that feeling really hurts. I felt like I did something wrong, especially because He never made an effort with me, like I wasn't worthy of His attention or something. I have since gotten over that. I realize that I did nothing to deserve that, and he's just a butthead. I know I deserve so much better.

But here's the thing. Where IS that so much better? It's not that I'm codependent and need a boyfriend to make me happy. I AM happy. I know I have flaws, but I also am able to love myself for who I am, and I know I'm never going to change that for a boy. I'm not desperate enough to act like a skank, either. It would just be really nice to get that special attention from a guy, you know? I want a guy to put in that extra effort, just to show he cares. Is that really so much to ask? I know I'm young, and I've got time, and I'm probably not going to marry the people I'm in school with right now. But lately, it would be really nice to feel like I am worth trying for.

Alright, I guess it's not really a broken heart, I'm suffering from. And maybe I live in a false reality of romantic movies. But I'm still holding out for my hero armed with a glue gun :)