Lately, I haven't really been as into the whole "gifts" part of Christmas. I mean, I like giving them and all. And I love seeing all the presents under the tree. But I don't really get excited about opening them anymore. Part of it is because now that I'm older, I help my parents pick out what I want and it's not really a surprise. But I also don't think that opening gifts is the most important part of Christmas. The Christmas season is religious, and is important to my faith. But it is also about family- getting together with your loved ones and kind of taking a break from all the crazy-ness in your life and being together. However, this year, I opened two of the best gifts I have ever received in my life, and reminded me that sometimes, it is important to receive graciously as well.
One amazing gift came from my little brother, Peter. Peter is truly one of my best friends- I mean I tell him EVERYTHING and trust him with all of my secrets. This Christmas, he was going on and on about how excited he was to give me his gift. I didn't have any idea what it was, but I definitely was not as excited as he was. When I opened the gift from my brother, I almost cried. See, my brother is in this class at school called Digital Design. Their latest project was to make a cup, and they etched on a design. I don't really know how it works. But my brother, being the little sweetheart that he is, gave me the cup he made in his class. It was so special. He knows I am a cray cray Harry Potter fan, and he made me a Harry Potter cup with my initials on it! It has the symbol of the Deathly Hallows and the quote from Dumbledore "It does not do to dwell on dreams and forget to live". !!!!!!! So not only was the cup awesome because it was a freaking sweet Harry Potter cup, but the fact that my brother put so much time and effort into it made me feel so loved. The love he put into making the cup made it so much more special, and the best gift I ever received.
But the love didn't stop there. On Christmas day, I went on facebook only to find a message from a friend. Now, I have been feeling sort of down lately, nothing too major, just normal teenage stuff, but I was feeling REALLY crappy last weekend. Well, this friend wrote to me pretty much thanking me for being who I am, always being a positive person and smiling and all that sort of stuff. It was so sweet of him to write me such a kind note, and made me feel SO good inside. I don't think he knows quite how much it meant to me to hear him say that.
Basically, I felt really special this Christmas. Two friends went out of their way to let me know that I was special and important to them. I wish there was some way that I could thank both of them for what they did and tell them how much it meant to me, but as of now, I am totally stumped for ideas. However, this Christmas has taught me that although it is very important to give- both to loved ones and the community- it is just as important to receive gifts- whether they come in the form of kind words from a friend or in boxes covered with wrapping paper.
Wednesday, December 29, 2010
Tuesday, December 21, 2010
$@&%#!
Swearing. Let's be honest, we all do it. We see swear words on TV, in books, and especially in the hallways at school. Naturally, it becomes a habit for ourselves, after being around it all the time. Right now, I'm at the point where those words just slip out before I can censor them. My biggest fear is that I'll swear in front of the kids I babysit or something, which would NOT be good. So, starting now, I, Greta Hallberg, solemnly swear to stop swearing and break my horrible habit. Here's why:
The reason people use swear words is because they are powerful. Not always in a good way, mind you. But there is definitely a sense of power when swear words are used. They can show just how emotional you are when talking about something you are passionate about. Sometimes, when you're really angry or upset, a swear word can help relieve some of that tension. Now, I'm not endorsing swearing at all, but I fully recognize that there is a time and place for everything. However, what I am trying to stop doing, is swearing in everyday situations, especially when joking with my friends. The thing of it is, if people continue to swear all the time, the words lose their meaning. They don't have as much of an impact. As a result, when you actually are really emotional and want to get a point across and do use a swear word, people don't necessarily take it to mean something important because the words have lost their impact. Do you see what I mean? It's a vicious cycle, a cycle I am desperately trying to end.
Another reason I want to break this awful habit, is that it's just not classy. For example, swear words are often used by illiterate people due to lack of vocabulary. I can think of countless examples in books where the uneducated characters swear up a storm! Swear words are often used in situations of high stress. (I'm thinking action movies here.) It's an instinctual reaction to stress, I get that. However, I would like to think of myself as an evolved being, to the point where reason and logic can overcome the natural instinct to sound like a sailor. Swear words have negative and angry connotation to them, and that's not how I want to come off. Finally, swearing is just not lady like. Don't get me wrong, I am a hardcore feminist, but I also think a certain value can be places on acting (and speaking!) like a lady.
So mark this day on your calendars, friends. As of December 21, 2010, Greta Hallberg has hereby decided to make a conscious effort to stop that potty mouth. :)
The reason people use swear words is because they are powerful. Not always in a good way, mind you. But there is definitely a sense of power when swear words are used. They can show just how emotional you are when talking about something you are passionate about. Sometimes, when you're really angry or upset, a swear word can help relieve some of that tension. Now, I'm not endorsing swearing at all, but I fully recognize that there is a time and place for everything. However, what I am trying to stop doing, is swearing in everyday situations, especially when joking with my friends. The thing of it is, if people continue to swear all the time, the words lose their meaning. They don't have as much of an impact. As a result, when you actually are really emotional and want to get a point across and do use a swear word, people don't necessarily take it to mean something important because the words have lost their impact. Do you see what I mean? It's a vicious cycle, a cycle I am desperately trying to end.
Another reason I want to break this awful habit, is that it's just not classy. For example, swear words are often used by illiterate people due to lack of vocabulary. I can think of countless examples in books where the uneducated characters swear up a storm! Swear words are often used in situations of high stress. (I'm thinking action movies here.) It's an instinctual reaction to stress, I get that. However, I would like to think of myself as an evolved being, to the point where reason and logic can overcome the natural instinct to sound like a sailor. Swear words have negative and angry connotation to them, and that's not how I want to come off. Finally, swearing is just not lady like. Don't get me wrong, I am a hardcore feminist, but I also think a certain value can be places on acting (and speaking!) like a lady.
So mark this day on your calendars, friends. As of December 21, 2010, Greta Hallberg has hereby decided to make a conscious effort to stop that potty mouth. :)
Sunday, December 12, 2010
SHOW CHOIR.
Today, I discovered a new passion for the performing arts. I guess you could say I've always had it. I mean, I'm a dancer. I've always loved musicals- even though the only one I was in was for church- but whenever I see people singing and dancing on stage, I wish I was up there. I LOVE it.
And today at my church, I had a very small role in a Christmas show, but I did have a few lines and a funny singing part. And not to toot my own horn, but I sort of rocked it. I felt GREAT about my performance and a lot of people complimented me on what I did. And I gotta say, performing like that just felt amazing. The adrenaline was pumping like you can't believe, and I felt better with each second, gaining confidence as I went. In that moment, with my arms pointed straight up, belting out the last few notes, I realized that I wanted to do that again. And again. And again.
I mean, I'm in choir at church, but I want to be in show choir, like glee :) Or, in an actual show. It's not even the speaking that I want. I want to sing, and dance, and have that feeling again. It was absolutely incredible. So, my plan is to get involved with theater- maybe at my school? If not for sure at church. And maybe even community theater this summer or something. Because I've always said I wanted to do it, but I've never really meant it until now. And trust me, I mean it.
And today at my church, I had a very small role in a Christmas show, but I did have a few lines and a funny singing part. And not to toot my own horn, but I sort of rocked it. I felt GREAT about my performance and a lot of people complimented me on what I did. And I gotta say, performing like that just felt amazing. The adrenaline was pumping like you can't believe, and I felt better with each second, gaining confidence as I went. In that moment, with my arms pointed straight up, belting out the last few notes, I realized that I wanted to do that again. And again. And again.
I mean, I'm in choir at church, but I want to be in show choir, like glee :) Or, in an actual show. It's not even the speaking that I want. I want to sing, and dance, and have that feeling again. It was absolutely incredible. So, my plan is to get involved with theater- maybe at my school? If not for sure at church. And maybe even community theater this summer or something. Because I've always said I wanted to do it, but I've never really meant it until now. And trust me, I mean it.
Wednesday, December 8, 2010
FOR THE BIRDS.
Today, I realized something very serious. My life has been laced with hypocrisy and double standards since I was a little girl and I had NO idea until today. This is a serious issue and it has left me very confused. Here's what happened.
I was wearing this adorable necklace and it has this bird charm on it. I got to thinking, and realized that apparently, I really like birds. I mean, I have 2 necklaces with birds on them- the one I was wearing and a necklace with an owl. Whenever I am shopping, I am automatically attracted to the accessories or clothes with birds on them. I was even trying to convince my mom to buy a bird-shaped ornament covered in feathers. If this weird obsession with bird-fashion weren't enough,my favorite animals as a kid were always birds. For as long as I can remember, I have just LOVED penguins. They were my favorite animal forever. I went through a flamingo phase, too. And I think I went through a peacock phase. Either way, my favorite animal growing up was always some species of bird.
How has my life been a lie, you ask? Well, I have a phobia of uncaged birds. They actually terrify me. I have this irrational fear of birds flying above me. The way the swoop makes me nervous, and I worry that they're going to poop on my head. Yes, I realize how silly that just sounded and I know I'm ridiculous. But birds really, really scare me! So now, I'm questioning everything I've ever thought about birds. I mean, those opinions are pretty conflicting. It doesn't make any sense. I know that I for sure love my bird necklaces and penguins are still probably my favorite animal. But I don't know what to tell people about my opinions on birds. I mean, they frighten me to death. But clearly, I'm obsessed. Oh, what's a girl to do?
I was wearing this adorable necklace and it has this bird charm on it. I got to thinking, and realized that apparently, I really like birds. I mean, I have 2 necklaces with birds on them- the one I was wearing and a necklace with an owl. Whenever I am shopping, I am automatically attracted to the accessories or clothes with birds on them. I was even trying to convince my mom to buy a bird-shaped ornament covered in feathers. If this weird obsession with bird-fashion weren't enough,my favorite animals as a kid were always birds. For as long as I can remember, I have just LOVED penguins. They were my favorite animal forever. I went through a flamingo phase, too. And I think I went through a peacock phase. Either way, my favorite animal growing up was always some species of bird.
How has my life been a lie, you ask? Well, I have a phobia of uncaged birds. They actually terrify me. I have this irrational fear of birds flying above me. The way the swoop makes me nervous, and I worry that they're going to poop on my head. Yes, I realize how silly that just sounded and I know I'm ridiculous. But birds really, really scare me! So now, I'm questioning everything I've ever thought about birds. I mean, those opinions are pretty conflicting. It doesn't make any sense. I know that I for sure love my bird necklaces and penguins are still probably my favorite animal. But I don't know what to tell people about my opinions on birds. I mean, they frighten me to death. But clearly, I'm obsessed. Oh, what's a girl to do?
Wednesday, December 1, 2010
GLUE GUNS.
You know that saying, that for every girl with a broken heart is a boy with a glue gun? Apparently the boys at Wayzata need to make a little trip to Michael's because there has definitely not been some heroic, romantic boy to make me feel better after everything that has happened with... HIM. (I don't like to gossip about people, especially over the internet, but blogging is like therapy and I need to talk about what happened to make this post relavent.)
Long story short: He and I "dated" for like 2 weeks, we went on 1 "date" and hung out 1 other time. At the same him, my friend (let's call her Loretta) was dating my other friend (maybe...Reginald?) but after a while she decided she didn't like him as much as she thought and was planning on breaking up with him. Anyway, He and I broke up on Tuesday. Loretta didn't dump Reginald until Thursday. He and Loretta went on a date that Friday night. SWEEEET.
I realize it seems like I talk about Him a lot. And maybe you're thinking, "this chick still likes Him!" I assure you, I don't. That is NOT the issue. I mean, when He and I broke up, my immediate reaction was relief! He just added more stress to my life and I wasn't entirely sure how I felt about him anyway. Plus, He treated me really terribly. I never really felt like I was special, or like he was excited to see me. But after I found out about the date, I realized how He obviously didn't care about me at all. I gotta admit, that feeling really hurts. I felt like I did something wrong, especially because He never made an effort with me, like I wasn't worthy of His attention or something. I have since gotten over that. I realize that I did nothing to deserve that, and he's just a butthead. I know I deserve so much better.
But here's the thing. Where IS that so much better? It's not that I'm codependent and need a boyfriend to make me happy. I AM happy. I know I have flaws, but I also am able to love myself for who I am, and I know I'm never going to change that for a boy. I'm not desperate enough to act like a skank, either. It would just be really nice to get that special attention from a guy, you know? I want a guy to put in that extra effort, just to show he cares. Is that really so much to ask? I know I'm young, and I've got time, and I'm probably not going to marry the people I'm in school with right now. But lately, it would be really nice to feel like I am worth trying for.
Alright, I guess it's not really a broken heart, I'm suffering from. And maybe I live in a false reality of romantic movies. But I'm still holding out for my hero armed with a glue gun :)
Long story short: He and I "dated" for like 2 weeks, we went on 1 "date" and hung out 1 other time. At the same him, my friend (let's call her Loretta) was dating my other friend (maybe...Reginald?) but after a while she decided she didn't like him as much as she thought and was planning on breaking up with him. Anyway, He and I broke up on Tuesday. Loretta didn't dump Reginald until Thursday. He and Loretta went on a date that Friday night. SWEEEET.
I realize it seems like I talk about Him a lot. And maybe you're thinking, "this chick still likes Him!" I assure you, I don't. That is NOT the issue. I mean, when He and I broke up, my immediate reaction was relief! He just added more stress to my life and I wasn't entirely sure how I felt about him anyway. Plus, He treated me really terribly. I never really felt like I was special, or like he was excited to see me. But after I found out about the date, I realized how He obviously didn't care about me at all. I gotta admit, that feeling really hurts. I felt like I did something wrong, especially because He never made an effort with me, like I wasn't worthy of His attention or something. I have since gotten over that. I realize that I did nothing to deserve that, and he's just a butthead. I know I deserve so much better.
But here's the thing. Where IS that so much better? It's not that I'm codependent and need a boyfriend to make me happy. I AM happy. I know I have flaws, but I also am able to love myself for who I am, and I know I'm never going to change that for a boy. I'm not desperate enough to act like a skank, either. It would just be really nice to get that special attention from a guy, you know? I want a guy to put in that extra effort, just to show he cares. Is that really so much to ask? I know I'm young, and I've got time, and I'm probably not going to marry the people I'm in school with right now. But lately, it would be really nice to feel like I am worth trying for.
Alright, I guess it's not really a broken heart, I'm suffering from. And maybe I live in a false reality of romantic movies. But I'm still holding out for my hero armed with a glue gun :)
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